Culture Jam #3

Pranksters print spoof NY Times
Front page of spoof paper
The spoof edition fooled many readers

A fake edition of the New York Times announcing the end of the Iraq war has been handed out to commuters in the US.

More than 1m free copies of the 14-page "special edition" newspaper were distributed mainly in the cities of New York and Los Angeles.

Another bogus story was about all Americans being given free health care.

A liberal group called the Yes Men, well known in the US for its practical jokes, claimed responsibility for the elaborate prank.

The fake paper - dated 4 July 2009 - had a motto on its front page which read "all the news we hope to print".

The hoax was accompanied by a web site that mimicked the look of The New York Times's real website.

A page of the spoof site contained links to dozens of liberal organisations, which were also listed in the print edition.

The fake edition surprised commuters, many of whom took the free copies thinking they were legitimate.

Later, the Yes Men issued a statement claiming responsibility.

"In an elaborate operation six months in the planning, 1.2m papers were printed at six different presses and driven to pre-arranged pickup locations."

The statement added that thousands of volunteers helped to distribute the fake edition.

A spokeswoman for the newspaper, Catherine Mathis said "This is obviously a fake issue of The Times. We are in the process of finding out more about it."

Pudding Proof #7

Pudding Proof #6

Pudding Proof #5

Bear found dumped at WCU with Obama signs

Dale Neal • DNeal@CITIZEN-TIMES.com • published October 20, 2008 4:46 pm

CULLOWHEE – A dead bear was found dumped this morning on the Western Carolina University campus, draped with a pair of Obama campaign signs, university police said.

Maintenance workers reported about 7:45 a.m. finding a 75-pound bear cub dumped at the roundabout near the Catamount statute at the entrance to campus, said Tom Johnson, chief of university police.

“It looked like it had been shot in the head as best we can tell. A couple of Obama campaign signs had been stapled together and stuck over its head,” Johnson said.

University police called in N.C. Wildlife Resources officials to remove the body and help in the investigation. Bear season is currently under way in Western North Carolina.

“This is certainly unacceptable,” Johnson said. “Someone was wanting to draw attention to the election. If we find out who they are, we’ll make sure they’ll get some attention themselves.”

"Western Carolina University deplores the inappropriate behavior that led to this troubling incident," said Leila Tvedt, associate vice chancellor "We cannot speculate on the motives of the people involved, nor who those people might be. Campus police are cooperating with authorities to investigate this matter."

Anyone with information should call WCU police at 828-227-7301.

The Electric Mayhem

Pudding Proof #4

(united states navy building)

Culture Jam #2

Women With Guns #5

You're Doing It Right #2

Pudding Proof #3

Women With Guns #4

You're Doing It Wrong #3

Pudding Proof #2

Women With Guns #3

Pudding Proof #1

Women With Guns #2

You're Doing It Right #1

You're Doing It Wrong #2

Women With Guns #1

Culture Jam #1

You're Doing It Wrong #1

fuckin shit.
just woke up
hacking cough
Smells like corporate cigarettes down here in the office. Someone smoked a pack last night.
Smells like shit. Boxed cigarettes are the devils tampons.
Woke up to fucking dogs barking and barking and barking over and over and over
I feel like punching someone in the face
Then i heard my roommate pull up
i was just getting myself up to see what the dog deal was, knowing we have cats...
Sleep in my eyes, pain in my head, not enough sleep in my body, I look out the window and see one of our cats, Lee Van Cleef, in a lawnchair, all raised up, and two fucking asshole dogs will be dogs dogs barking at him. But my roommate has been in his van for a minute, right there, right there in front of the whole spectacle. Just sitting in the van. Watching. I say 'PUSSIES' aloud.

Dogs chased cat, because cat ran, ("dogs cannot chase sitting rabbit", thats like a modern primitive proverb or something i coined), and i dont know what happened cuz i was upstairs when chase began. Lee Van Cleef doesnt seem to have made it into the house though.

Waking up with the feeling of punching faces is definitely not good for you.

Found Old Words

So life is a big fucking charade. Drop it! Take the masks down - your attitude and stance is all charade - life is a parade and death waits for you on both sides, both sides of the street are lined with death - party on - skinhead - pimpin' n your ride G, bling da fuckin blingidy bling - Death Waits! Drop yesterday! That is so then - this is so now! Yesterday is so totally yesterday, the last 10 yrs of your life are gone - yesterday. Forget about it. Drop your charade - be real. Dont live live up to yesterdays precedent - open yourself up truly - 16 was 16, 20 was 20, punk rock was punk rock - Let It Be! How much more straight forward can i be? Walking around like you know everything makes it so can can never learn anything - cuz you already know it all - Ice T or Limp biskit or nin already schooled you - you found out who you are - youre hard - youre in pain - you dont give a fuck - + youve been Branded. Stop living up to what you think you are. Lifestyles have to be lived up to! So drop the act, drop the rules, open Up - do something that you dont do - eat something that you wont eat - say someting that you wouldnt say - live without something you cannot live without. Drop the charade & forget your rules - "tear up your dictionaries" Dont define yourself by past experience, by who you think you are, by who you imagine yourself to be.

things i saw

AT the sunburned hand of the man show
i saw stripes
i saw legs

AT the front yard
i saw a 2 and a half foot tall bird standing
i saw a chipmunk hopping high to get away from a cat named Lee Van Cleef
i saw the bird fly to the lake
i saw the cat in my hands
i saw the chipmunk run away
i saw the skeleton of a previous chipmunk

What I'm having

grapes
cantaloupe
watermelon
pineapple
honeydew
one cup of coffee

What I had

green tea
total with whole milk
english muffin, one side cream cheese, one side butter and jelly
scrambled egg, bell peppers, potato, wrapped in tortilla
2 cups coffee
a wee bit of guac
2 shots of tully
2 bottles of pbr
several slices of pizza
one can of coke
water

i sell the american dream

i had a dream i lived on 20 acres in the middle of an ex-brady bunch neighborhood, now populated by Ethiopian cab drivers and Indians who work at Dunkin Donuts. It was the oldest house in the hood, complete with a 4 acre lake and 2 wells. Raccoons and possums and a hawk lived there too. Most of the trees were covered in vines. A small stream ran thru. The house was an incredible deal, originally posted on craigslist as a 6 month lease only because of intention to tear it down and built townhouses.... but not out of greed, no, the idea was to not only have one family with a lake view, but several several families a lake view. Well, thats what the property manager said anyway. So we were told we could do anything we wanted and we did do whatever we wanted. 6 months turned into 3 years and no lease at all. Then a bright yellow HUMMER showed up with a couple, straight out of 90210, and an agent, all scanning the property. Blackberries in hand, diamonds on neck, platinum on hair, they all shook heads and hands. I looked over all my items of property... records, record players, t shirts, guitars, amps, desk, tables, chairs, bikes, plates, microcassettes, computers, batteries, printers, vhs tapes, dvds, cats, posters, books, carpets. It seemed that in 36 years i had acquired much too much to be moving. And way more than i could ever take with me

woke up

woke up from a dream that the city ordinance guy came to our house today about a noise complaint. the complaint was the second... the new one happening last month. supposedly we were advertising on popular internet group sites that we were having concerts and charging 20$ per car load of people to come here. he was a very cool fellow and said people should mind their own business. a few minutes later i dreamt that i went online and took down all references to having shows here. then i woke up

molar

it broke tonight. no pain, yet. crucial tooth. want bionic jaw + teeth.