BS TOUR

dream
INC, but no miami. think inc on tour. think i was supposed to be in philly.

i was naked in bed sitting up. the bedroom door was slightly open. the front picture window had a view of another noise house across the street. noise in both. some kinda big show. but it was daylight.. i sensed commotion across the street right after a particular person passed my door and crossed the street quickly, excitedly telling some fools at the other house to come back... maybe 10 cross the street in full arrogance, this "we're gonna kick some fucking ass man" strut, ive seen it many times.. im still sitting. i know they are going to come into the room for me. i think "its gonna trick them out when they see im nude! ha! smallminded egos"
SO theyve arrived at the house. at the door. where is the commotion? whats happened is that suddenly the energy is hushed... maybe they werent so excited about this in the first place. finally a girl comes in accusingly.
there were some jackasses there claiming i had some kinda affiliation with christianity that i was trying to hide. one of them pointed out a logo or something printed on an ankle strap i was wearing under pants, the kinda thing youd strap over your pants leg while riding a bike. so wow, hahaha, there was something there, oh no, totally busted. i leapt up onto the clapboard shoddy ass foot high stage, it was littered with silver microphone stands standing with different silver microphones of vintage nature, all of them wired up... the subliminator was in the crowd, perhaps about to go on soon? i yelled and laughed, jumped and hooted, called and wowed... not one of those mics helped me at all, the only things that were picked up were heavily effected, super short metallic delays, stuttering phase shifts, none understandable. it was my intention to tell these fools what fools they were by pointing out that i do my shopping at thrift stores, and, duh, theres your basis for having christian links on my clothes, its obvious to me, these places are full of promotional bullshit that they couldnt even give away, and christianity is one of the most self promotional organizations on the planet. IS the worlds most self promotional orginization.
but i spurted and laughed, bouncing up and down on this cheap stage, some hooted from the floor in excitement, but the message was lost, and that was fine i thought, it didnt and doesnt matter, just getting the irritation out that fools on earth cause me by showing what fool jackass sub animal being they can be, that was enough, i got it out.
later at a show there were still jackasses. big dumb dudes. picking up cases full of precious noise pedals and what, destroying them? stealing them? i know not what the intentions were. doesnt actually matter because i stopped this thick head with my shortwave, im like dude, fuck that, and i run around and swing, stab, poke punch breathe fire pull eyes out at all these motherfuckers and not one of them defends himself. runnin. yeah i know youre sayin Oh he's a big man in his dreams, like some jackie chan... you just let me catch you with my gear case dude. ill be breathing fire and shit. youll be all fucked up.

Culture Jam #3

Pranksters print spoof NY Times
Front page of spoof paper
The spoof edition fooled many readers

A fake edition of the New York Times announcing the end of the Iraq war has been handed out to commuters in the US.

More than 1m free copies of the 14-page "special edition" newspaper were distributed mainly in the cities of New York and Los Angeles.

Another bogus story was about all Americans being given free health care.

A liberal group called the Yes Men, well known in the US for its practical jokes, claimed responsibility for the elaborate prank.

The fake paper - dated 4 July 2009 - had a motto on its front page which read "all the news we hope to print".

The hoax was accompanied by a web site that mimicked the look of The New York Times's real website.

A page of the spoof site contained links to dozens of liberal organisations, which were also listed in the print edition.

The fake edition surprised commuters, many of whom took the free copies thinking they were legitimate.

Later, the Yes Men issued a statement claiming responsibility.

"In an elaborate operation six months in the planning, 1.2m papers were printed at six different presses and driven to pre-arranged pickup locations."

The statement added that thousands of volunteers helped to distribute the fake edition.

A spokeswoman for the newspaper, Catherine Mathis said "This is obviously a fake issue of The Times. We are in the process of finding out more about it."

Pudding Proof #7

Pudding Proof #6

Pudding Proof #5

Bear found dumped at WCU with Obama signs

Dale Neal • DNeal@CITIZEN-TIMES.com • published October 20, 2008 4:46 pm

CULLOWHEE – A dead bear was found dumped this morning on the Western Carolina University campus, draped with a pair of Obama campaign signs, university police said.

Maintenance workers reported about 7:45 a.m. finding a 75-pound bear cub dumped at the roundabout near the Catamount statute at the entrance to campus, said Tom Johnson, chief of university police.

“It looked like it had been shot in the head as best we can tell. A couple of Obama campaign signs had been stapled together and stuck over its head,” Johnson said.

University police called in N.C. Wildlife Resources officials to remove the body and help in the investigation. Bear season is currently under way in Western North Carolina.

“This is certainly unacceptable,” Johnson said. “Someone was wanting to draw attention to the election. If we find out who they are, we’ll make sure they’ll get some attention themselves.”

"Western Carolina University deplores the inappropriate behavior that led to this troubling incident," said Leila Tvedt, associate vice chancellor "We cannot speculate on the motives of the people involved, nor who those people might be. Campus police are cooperating with authorities to investigate this matter."

Anyone with information should call WCU police at 828-227-7301.

The Electric Mayhem

Pudding Proof #4

(united states navy building)